im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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