you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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