He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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