she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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