What a fucking waste of an outfit
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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