just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
