We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
