Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize