But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
