Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
