The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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