They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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