Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
