I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
