I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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