Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?