the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
