Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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