I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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