What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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