I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
