Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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