ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize