It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
