There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Quick, to the slutcave!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize