return my video game
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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