alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
either way he was missing a nipple.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Even my vagina gasped.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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