Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize