It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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