Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
