never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
