Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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