she was so not down for the gang bang
Life is so much better after having sex.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
