At least make sure they are 18
Why
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
