I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
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You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
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Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
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