Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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