Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
