If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
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