dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
PANTIES FOUND
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
