Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
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