so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
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