Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
