Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
