Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
