Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
