She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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