Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
