Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(620): View more from Kansas

my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"

(785): View more from Kansas

you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?

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(571): View more from Virginia

the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets

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(908): View more from New Jersey

i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.

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(765): View more from Indiana

We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.

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(512): View more from Texas

I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence

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