We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
We're not piercing ourselves today.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
