I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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